Short Hair​/​Weak Bones

by Helltown

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Short Hair 02:24
searching for meaning. when i get out of bed in the morning. waking up to coffee and cigarettes. and i hate myself like last month. maybe i just need a haircut. maybe with short hair now i can finally care now. maybe i can learn how to grief like a child. forget those old words. scattered in my notebooks. the ramblings of some kid. the ramblings of some kid. i'm moving on to next year. high hopes that i'm still here. maybe with short hair now i can finally care now. maybe i can learn how to forget these feelings.
sick and tired of these worn out hands. and silhouettes from the past in my window frames. whisper to me, whisper to me that there is no youth forever. do you remember the feelings? memories of a kiss on the cheek and a pendant hanging. carefree from the crook of her neck. sick and tired of these restless fucking thoughts. shadows in the hallways whisper to me. that no one lives forever. the ring sits and gathers this dust. while the sea salt has made the band start to rust but it sits. awaiting your fingertips. do you remember? a memory. a kiss on the cheek. and a pendant hanging carefree. from the crook of her neck. and if the shadows never leave. i'll pretend that it's you watching me. in another world. we've been apart. but i can still feel your beating heart.
empty apartment. and the bedsheets that you've been neglecting to change. because the scent. keeps your loneliness at bay. i sat in the back room. i just had my drink. i said that i loved you. but by then you were already leaving. and i'm too tired. i'll be sleeping alone.
Untitled #3 02:48
keep trying to escape the suburbs. and the memories you made last summer. best friends and first kisses. in a couple of years do you think you'll miss this. what happened to the could've beens? what happened to the should've beens? I swear that I've had too many of them (i keep trying to put a finger on the last time i saw you smile but i'm drawing a blank. keep trying to forget you and fall asleep but restlessly i lie awake) You are the ghost in my lungs. Memories I can't let go and move on.
record player static in the corner of your dads attic while i tell myself this will be the last song i write. drunk and stupid we walked to the liquor store. where i wanted to say i loved you. but i just couldn't find the right words. i couldn't find the right words. i was never good at the right time. and now i'm just some ghost. covered in concrete and plastic. in the walls you called you home. in the walls you call your home. and frozen processed foods. in the corner of some room. while your fathers downstairs watching television. riding bicycles down the street. do you think you maybe want to meet. so you can say something to me. i just need to hear your voice. i just want to hear your voice. i guess it doesn't help now to say i'm sorry.
Well i am weak I wasn’t built for this gravity now the weight is crushing me questioning my longevity sounds of comfort hidden in your heartbeat car rides and long distance calls speaking only in hushed tones i can barely made out a word you said do you remember seeing me i just remember disappearing back to my bedroom where i dreamt of you that night and am i doing okay, i’ve been better off i would say but right now this is all there is to me
Winter 02:32
when your cold. i'll give you my coat. when you smoke. i feel so guilty. when i'm stoned. i feel so alone. and so empty. because i really am. and when i call. will we talk at all. or listen to each others breath, the promise of a summer death. and a pipe full of crystal meth. to drown you out. when i'm home. by the telephone. waiting to see if it'll ring. this is a song that i might sing. to bring you back from memory. a delusion but so welcoming. into your arms may you bring, me some peace. and when i call. will we talk at all. or listen to each others breath, the promise of a summer death. and a pipe full of crystal meth. to drown you out.
Well if you’re calling to say Happy New Years. Fuck yourself. Because the odds are that I’m drunk and I’m alone. Wake up every morning to put on my shirt. and put on my tie. drink my coffee before I work Wonder what the point of being alive. If I spend my life wanting to die because I’m stuck at a dead end job What happened to the American dream. I swear I used to have one but I forgot what it means. when I’m distracted by debt collectors at the door but i’m killing myself over these coffee and cigarette breaks I’m dying out here in the american workplace I make enough for some gas, a beer, and some cigarettes here guess I’ll sleep it off wake up in the morning get ready for work
Do you ever miss the setting sun? or holding each other as if we were one. please let me call tonight. just so i can pretend nothing ever changed. its the way you felt when you would cry. its the way i feel when i want to die. and my memory it always tries. to forget you but oh why oh why must i... forget you. sitting in the backseat. on a long car ride from the city. while you sang songs from the 20's. in my black shirt like the bottom of your feet. its the way i want to be someone else. its all the feelings i can't help. it's the yells into the night when i'm at some show. its the way that i can't let you go.


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cover photo by Ben Zucker

written and recorded by Helltown

15 White Cassettes, Handwritten labels available in store


D.I.Y or CRY


released December 9, 2013


all rights reserved



Lost State Records Portland, Oregon

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